THE HOOTS PREDICT WWE GREAT BALLS OF FIRE

THE HOOTS PREDICT WWE GREAT BALLS OF FIRE

If this isn't the BEST Pay-Per-View name ever I don't know what is. At first everyone was like wtf, Great Balls of Fire?! But now it works, it works because you have two of wrestling's well known badasses going toe to toe. I'm talking about Bork Lazor and Joey Samoee for the Galactic Championship. So let's get to the predicting shall we....

KICK OFF MATCH: NEVILLE (c) VS. AKIRA TOZAWA - CRUISERWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP

I really don't understand why they keep regulating the cruiserweights to the Kick Off show. In my opinion there should be no matches on the Kick Off show. They should just highlight and review every match on the ppv adding additional hype. Anyway to the hoots it's pretty much a forgone conclusion that Neville retains. If Titus O'Neil somehow gets involved on Tozawa's behalf I think it would damage his credibility as a babyface and a performer. King Orc wins via Red Arrow.

Trash - TOZAWA
Goodbrother Dan - Neville
Overlord - Neville
Boob - Tozawa
War - nnn-Pac
DieCobros - Neville
Jonny D - Neville
Kass - King Orc

ALEXA BLISS VS. SASHA BANKS - WOMEN'S CHAMPIONSHIP

This should be good, only because as performers these two know how to work brother or should I say say sister?. Sure Sasha will probably most definitely fall on her neck and/or head on a hoot average of 3 times during this match but it still will be solid. I hope they don't decide to hot potato the title to Sasha just to shake things up, which we know WWE booking likes to do. Every single hoot picked Alexa to retain here, clean sweep!

Trash - Alexa
Goodbrother Dan - Alexa
Overlord -Bliss
Boob - Bliss
War - Blexa Aliss
DieCobros - Bliss
Jonny D - Bliss
Kass - Alexa
 

ENZO AMORE VS. BIG CASS

It's too early hoot! They should've waited to break them up, at least let them establish themselves as a legit tag team first. Obviously WWE creative went a different route, thirsty AF to push Big Cass to the moon and leave Enzo in the dust. One thing is certain these two are doing the best with the short build they have. Which is a testament to both their work ethics. Most of us would agree that Big Cass is the favorite to win this. I see this match as being completely one-sided but Enzo showing tons of heart by kicking out of nearly everything. I've watched both these guys since their NXT debut, it's cool to see WWE giving them a good bit of spotlight. 7 Feet Tall and you can't teach that gets the W.

Trash - Large Kass
Goodbrother Dan - Big Cass
Overlord - Cassidy Hayes
Boob - Cass
War - 7'0" Tall
DieCobros - Cass
Jonny D - ENZO
Kass - 7 Foot Kass

THE MIZ (c) VS. DEAN AMBROSE - INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPIONSHIP

I'm sick of predicting this match, I'm sick of Dean Ambrose. You're not a lunatic because you tell bad jokes that don't get over. They need to not give him a script and let him just spew venom and be violent like we're all know he's capable of doing. If that happened maybe I might be interested in seeing this match up again. Designated bathroom break, Miz wins.

Trash - Miz
Goodbrother Dan - Miz
Overlord - Miz
Boob - Miz
War - Mizzle
DieCobros - Miz
Jonny D - Miz
Kass - Miz

30 MINUTE IRON MAN: SHESARO VS. THE HARDY BOYZ - TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP

This is another match up that's a bit stale to me. It feels like RAW doesn't have any credible tag teams at the moment. Especially babyface teams, since they broke Enzo & Cass, Rhyno & Heath Slater haven't done squat since coming to RAW. With the tag team division in flux, at least until The Revival return this match could really go either way. I don't know why this is an 30 minute Iron Man just like I didn't understand why they had a cage match at the last RAW ppv. Anyway the majority of the hoots went with Sheamus & Cesaro to win. I agree.

Trash - Hardos
Goodbrother Dan - Hardyz
Overlord - Shesaro
Boob - Shesaro
War - CC Lobster Factory
DieCobros - Shesaro
Jonny D - The Bar
Kass - Shesaro
 

SETH ROLLINS VS. BRAY WYATT

I should care about this match but I don't. Why don't I care? Because neither is what they should be. Seth just destroyed the Andre the Giant statue to help market WWE 2K18 video game and the entire arena lights up whenever Bray makes his way to the ring. In otherwords Seth should be the bad guy and Bray the uber babyface. Currently Seth is vanilla AF and Bray is just a jobber to the stars. Everyone except Trash is has Seth going over.

Trash - Bray
Goodbrother Dan - Seth
Overlord - SETH METAL
Boob - Seth
War - X-Fit Jesus
DieCobros - Rollin Rollin Rollin
Jonny D - Seth
Kass - Seth

AMBULANCE MATCH: ROMAN REIGNS VS. BRAUN STRAUMAN

YESH!!! I'm hyped for this match. I like how both of these guys work, this should be hard hitting with a lot of cool big man spots. I don't think Ramen gets enough credit for his selling and ring psychology. He also knows how to perform in big match situations. Now Strongman, he's just a behemoth with a bit of athletic prowess. I think even though this is a gimmick match, it will only add to what these guys will do physically. Whoever wins this will probably be facing Brock at Summerslam. I'm going with Braun on this one, but could go either way.

Trash - BRAUN
Goodbrother Dan - Roman
Overlord - BRAUNNNN
Boob - Reigns
War - Ramen
DieCobros - Krogan Reigns
Jonny D - Roman
Kass - Strongman
 

MAIN EVENT: BROCK LESNAR (c) VS. SAMOA JOE - UNIVERSAL CHAMPIONSHIP

I'd never really fathomed this match up until recently. There's very few matches I want to see regardless of the somewhat predictable finish. Just to see these to bullish wrestlers lock horns alone is enough to get me through the rest of the show easy. BUT and I put a Naomi sized butt with neon lights in there because this could be catastrophic for Joe's character if Bork destroys him a la Ambrose at Wrestlemania. The build to this match as been done damn well, yet it won't take much for hardcore or casual fans to invest. I don't think there is two more over badasses in WWE right now than Bork and Joe. Although this is a clean sweep and every hoot has Brock winning this is a great Main Event for a new ppv. Suplex City Average: 10

Trash - Piss Lord
Goodbrother Dan - Brock
Overlord - BORK BORK BORK
Boob - Brock
War - Bork Lazor
DieCobros - Bork Lazer
Jonny D - Brock
Kass - Bork
 

The Ballad of Bork Laser

The Ballad of Bork Laser

THE HOOTS PREDICT WWE MONEY IN THE BANK

THE HOOTS PREDICT WWE MONEY IN THE BANK